Another Song..

Was feeling sad and sorry for myself..and then this came to me..another song about us..


I don't need a big house 

I don't want no fancy car
We can live in that godawful house
Or the back of the ute for all I care
I don't need no commitment 
I don't ever want to tie you down
We can go wandering till your heart's content 
Or we can just sit there and talk till morning comes
I don't want no one else I don't need no other
We can go on and on if you like 
In my heart I know I've been waiting for you for all of my life 
I don't want to go on without you
I don't need my heart to be whole 
We can ignore it ..
We can try to curb it this feeling inside
But what's the point? 
Told you already ..
I'd follow you to the end of the earth 
If you would only let me
If you would only let me

One Dead Duck

He told me on our first night together..don't fall in love with me..well guess what? I have fallen for him..and not just a little fall..a hard thump..hehehe

This morning we've met for the 5th time in only 3 weeks..3 meetings this week..just being near him is enough..to be able to see him..to smell him..to just cuddle him..I cried after we made love..cried because I am happy I have found him..sad because it will be another 5 weeks before I can see him again..

Going to keep busy the next few weeks so that I don't think about him..yes I think that is the way to go..

Mutual

I am going crazy..feels like a teenager..waiting for every text..I know he's busy..and pride won't let me text unless he's replied to my prior text..can't seem to get him out of my head..it drives me mad..if this is what love is I don't want it..I don't want to feel insecure..

We are to meet again this week sometimes..he's already hinted what will happen..he's going to take me to the next level..I think he felt it too..felt our bodies responding to each other..

We chatted the other day and he's said he will take me to a nude beach if I go nude..hehehe to which I'd replied sure why not..it's a date..he then replied it's lots of dates he hope..funny..

I don't want to lose him..yet I don't know if I am the person he's looking for..lol..

Buffet

Yes..it is indeed a buffet..a buffet of men..lol..blonde and brunette..long and shaved..slim and round..all sorts..you can taste them one by one if you like..and if you request there's a galore of private albums to browse..it's like a shopping mall for a one night stand..an affair..you can see their faces..and also their body..even the private bits..what's on offer..hehehe

The thing is..even with the buffet some looks edible and some don't..and then meeting for coffee they either click or they don't..coffees are fine..bed is another matter..ehhehe

So to date I have met a few..mostly for coffees..not traditional coffees..don't like sitting down to talk..I like to go for walks in the park..or shopping..it's nice to have someone to help you push the trolley..ehehhe have also been grocery shopping too..helps break the ice..

It's good for connections I guess..I now know a muso..a music teacher..a store man..a fork lift driver..a manager..a car dealer who have offered me a job with him..lol..wonders what the job description is?
a dessert chef..a builder..a truck driver..oh and the newest one an ATM installer...a data analyst..and whatever else..eheheh

Anyhow it's fun to chat..as long as they behave..:)

Happy..

Have been on a roll..3 songs in a space of 24 hours..have given them away to a new friend..he's fiddling with it to add music to them..funny how things fall into place..

Yesterday driving home from Ocean Grove I took the wrong turn..so ended up somewhere else..thus began my bubble adventure..turned to the iPhone for help..that was then that there was a message from an acquaintance on chat..he asked if I would like to have a coffee with him and so it all went from there..

a chance meeting..I was a slob..as was in my driving clothes..so had on a stained Tshirt..ate some oranges before that..and well wasn't looking..it dripped...had trackies on and a pair of thongs..no bras either..told him I cant really do coffee..so he suggested we just meet as he would love to meet me even if I was a slob..

what a sweetie..standing there with his guitar and a back pack..he looked cute in his beanie..and oh so cold..his face..his hands were frozen..apparently he's been standing in the cold for 20 minutes to wait for me..and me stuck in traffic..

so here is what I wrote..thought of it on the way home..and he's already roughly popped music to it..sounded not bad for a 5 minutes job..:)

Traffic traffic
Blame it on the traffic
15 minutes more..
You kissing me
Me kissing you
15 minutes more..

Chatting chatting
Blame it on the chatting
15 minutes more
You holding me
Me holding you
15 minutes more

Hello hello
Blame it on the hello
15 minutes more
You loving me
Me loving you
15 minutes more..

Loving..

It was nice to be loved by him..like one of those songs..he's a muso..and a muso he is..poor as a church mouse..and a gentle soul..guess all musos are gentle souls..

We met twice..once was a 15 minutes meeting..the second was a half a day and night..spent getting lost in the countryside and then holding each other to sleep..it was really nice..

That was Saturday morning when we departed..on Monday morning I got a message from him..he told me he's met someone..a girl his age..plays the guitar and has a vegetarian and gluten free diet..

Told him match made in heaven go for it..and don't worry about me..he then wrote a few lovely emails to make me feel special as having been dumped by him? hehehe anyhow he still hopes we can still be friends as he likes my songs and I need him to make them come alive..thus we still needed each other..

I do like him a lot...he makes everyone around him feels special..and to think a few years back we'd bumped into each other and didn't realise..as he told me he'd caught the bus and would get off the bus heading the opposite way to me..yet he never said hello..he said I was in a world of my own..and me? I never noticed anything or anyone..funny how years down the track we've met..guess we were suppose to meet after all..

and yes..I thank whoever is up there that arranged for us to meet..he soothes my soul with his songs..

Somehow

Once in awhile I let someone in..then I wonder how the hell they got in? I'd made sure..made sure my heart's fully armoured..

It was just like that..we met for coffee..only chatted to him a few times..nothing much registered I knew he lived about 160km from me..too far to ever meet..yet we did meet..

We met one Saturday morning in the city for coffee and doughnuts..I was running really late..he waited..we had about an hour and a half to get to know each other..then he walked me to the station to see me off..at the gates he gave me a kiss..a light kiss on my lips..on the way home I was thinking what the? why didn't he just peck me on the cheeks? it wasn't a proper kiss at all..teased him about it..he replied next time we meet I will give you a proper kiss..

Then we met again last night..he came for dinner..and we ended up in bed..and that must have been it..I'd let him in unknowingly..he said to me don't fall in love with me..I'd laugh then..saying don't worry.. after the last time my heart's fully armoured..

Woke up crying this morning..last night was the most beautiful night that ever was..I felt loved..and in returned I loved him..first time in years I'd wanted more..I'd wanted what I knew he couldn't give..